Friday, June 26, 2009

the exhibitionist

"i want to spread myself out for you
i want you to see
all of me"

and when i say this,
i excite you
i arouse you
i make a new man out of you
don't i?

i start shedding,
my sensual body
is clothed only in your gasp and your stare
and the look on your face
is enough to arouse me as well

touch me with your naked hand
all my clothes undone
you think i am done
but not yet
for i havent shed anything yet

in unintentional ingenuity
(but oh what ingenuity!)
i shed
and i shed
shed skin and flesh and bone
in front of your eyes
until i am nothing more
than just the vaguest memory of somebody dead

i wanted to show
i wanted to tell
i wanted to reveal
and leave nothing behind for you to misunderstand

i left nothing behind

you saw
you saw all of me
but what you saw
you couldn't make out
as me
because you knew, i know, you too are what i am on the inside
the same flesh, the same blood, the same gory biological detail nobody wants to pay attention to -
ugly, intolerable truth.
but why must it be told?
why must it be shown?
when it's in all of us
and showing thus, it keeps us from remaining alive.
in showing all that can be seen
there was nothing left of me.

we all want to see
we all want to be shown
i think you got more than you asked for
but i wanted to show more
i wanted to show so much more
but i was gone before i was done
so maybe you did misunderstand me, after all.

and just to be fair
i hope you'll keep a lock of my hair.

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